Why You’ve Lost Your Edge; And How To Get It Back

Why You’ve Lost Your Edge; And How To Get It Back

You’ve lost your edge. You’ve been feeling flat lately; worn down. Work’s been rough. You can’t seem to make it more than a couple of days without fighting with your wife. Your confidence is shot. You’ve slipped into a habit of escaping; into drinking, or sports, or games, or porn.

Maybe this is just middle age? Maybe this is just your new normal? Oh well, that sucks…huh, wonder what’s in your Netflix queue.

Bullshit!

You don’t have to settle for unsettled. You don’t have to settle for anxious, half-assed and lethargic.

You CAN get your edge back.

To get it back, you need to get uncomfortable.

You sharpen a knife with grinding, with friction, with violence. You give it an edge by removing the extra metal that is getting in the way of the cutting surface. You don’t sharpen a knife with Nerf.

But your life is Nerf. You’ve carved out a large comfort zone for yourself. You have created a life in which you can mostly drift through and be OK. An OK marriage, an OK job, an OK relationship with your kids. But because you don’t need an edge to be just OK, because you don’t need an edge to survive in your comfort zone, your edge has dulled.

If you want your edge back, you’ve got to get the hell out of your comfort zone. You need to put yourself in situations where you are required to choose courage. You’ve got to become comfortable with being uncomfortable.

“You should always be a little hungry and a little cold.” Ramon Navarro

How to get your edge back

Why you've lost your edge

Getting your edge back isn’t just about feeling better. Getting your edge back is about leading better, loving better, and living better. A man without an edge is a man without a purpose. If you want to be a better leader, a better husband, a better father, a better friend…get your edge back.

Here are a couple of ways I’ve sharpened my edge over the years:

I used to be scared of open water swimming, so I swam in the Alcatraz Invitational.

Last year, I volunteered to be a mentor for a fatherless inner-city boy, despite being anxious about my ability to connect with and be accepted by a young black kid.

In 2016, I’ve committed to learn guitar despite a lifelong belief that I’m just not musically inclined.

So far, I’ve been practicing three times a week and have the finger callouses to prove it.

Notice a theme here?

To get your edge back you’ve got to do shit that scares you, and you’ve got to take action that directly opposes your limiting beliefs.  Bottom line. Get the hell out of your comfort zone.

What does that look like for you?

If you are a perfectionist and get uncomfortable when you aren’t in control, you should go take an improv comedy class.

If you are self-conscious and don’t like being judged, you should go join Toastmasters.

If you are out of shape and feel insecure, you should pay to sign up for a Tough Mudder, 5K race or other event and start training for it.

Get the hell out of your comfort zone.

No, it’s not easy. But that’s ok. Things are either easy or important, not both.

You were meant to live a big meaningful life. And, in order to fulfill that destiny, you’re going to have to cut through a lot of fear, a lot of distractions, and a lot of bullshit. And in order to do all that cutting, you’re going to need a sharp edge.

Not sure where to start? Download our free goal-setting workbook Goals to Gold, set some scary goals, and go get your edge back.

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